Kim and Jared: Fully alive
by Pia193
Summary: Kim is the different independent girl. Outcast of her little school and member of a punk geeky garage band. She has a secret. She is in love with the smoking hot bad boy Jared. What happen when He falls in love with her?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1 **

**Song: Fully alive by Flyleaf**

Daily routine

Another lonely, wet morning. Another day of life for my million questions. Why? Why do I have to feel something so dark and painful but at the same time so strong and beautiful? Maybe is love or passion, desire for what I really can't get. I wake up and just stare at the plain roof of my bedroom. I think about my day that will be nothing exciting. My path is easy. Go down stairs, eat, say hello to Lou and give her food, go to my car and pick up Mattie.

"Kim, do it. Wake up." I tell myself I think just to check if I still alive and the pain that run through my veins is real and to be able to think that I still have hope. I stand up and go to my mirror. I am standing in front of my too skinny thin almost naked body. Since I reached puberty, I sleep half naked just to feel the touch of the covers on my arms and my long legs just to dream that one day those covers would be his big, masculine hands. I sit down in front of it and I just stare watching what I am. I realize I still have rest of eyeliner. The mascara and a horrible addicted smell of the thousand cigarettes that I smoked yesterday. I check my cheeks so prominent under the olive color of my (thanks God) healthy skin. I have a small pair of eyes with a dark brown mud color.

"Kim, come on. Wake up. I have to go to work. Take care and save some food for me."

That is my dad. He and my mom work every day of the single year. They just don't stop. I envy them because they are too busy to think about a stupid high school crush or even their 17 year old weird daughter.

_What would be doing Jared at this time?_ That's my question. He should be getting ready for school, looking for the perfect shirt that has the gift to be on his extraordinary body.

While I take a shower and let the hot water take all my dreams away I remember how all this insane love started. It was in middle I was 11 and I just saw him. He had the most amazing smile. He looked gorgeous almost too cute to be a human being. He had short, black hair and his hypnotic dark almost dark as the night eyes. First I just had the desire to be near him. To be able to witness something so beautiful and abnormal, but the puberty played an unfair game with me. That desire of friendship and evidence of goodness became an obsession, passion, love. I don't remember a single day of my adolescence without waking up and thinking about him or closing my eyes and imagining his face.

I go to my closet that is in my bathroom. That is one of the advantages of living alone in the first floor of your house and being an only child. I put on my baggy almost too huge gray jeans, my Pink Floyd old shirt and my jet black raincoat. All this with my normal ponytail my ocean of black eyeliner and my sea of mascara, every time that I finish this daily ritual I realize that I do this just to get attention. And trust me I get but not from the person, the young man that I want.

"Lou time for breakfast, come on you silly teddy bear" Lou is my partner in everything, she is just the canine version of myself, she had been through a lot this past years and because her sharp, green eyes I always try to look happy in front of her.

I give Lou her plate of Alpo, take my two bibles (iPod and guitar) and go outside to my car, my temple and the scenario of the countless dramas and panic attacks that I have had. It sounds selfish but it seems that everything around me had been witness of my painful unknown love to Jared.

"What's up dude? What are our plans for this not sunny day?" Matthias, my best friend since only God knows when. He is just like me suffering for a kind of pain, I think or maybe he is just going through high school and I am so melodramatic that I think that every one has a kind of pain.

"What do you prefer? Going to stare at the corpses that we have as teachers, or watch the too foggy fog?"

"You are in your days right? God I am starting to hate this, you are always sad because the stupid Jared jerk or you are angry because you wake up and realize how stupid you are for being so obsess with the stupid Jared jerk!"

"Crap just shut up! Why don't you do the best damn thing that you know how to do and turn on the music?"

Every day is like this morning. I go out of my house thinking about Jared. I pick up Mattie thinking about Jared. I listen to my morning playlist (muse, linkin park, the who, oasis and keane) thinking that every single word of the lyrics of their songs is about my dreamed relationship with him. I drink my supersized cup of coffee and smoke my cigarette before eating the millions of tic-tacs for the breath thinking about him.

First period, algebra 2 honors! (Yeah, yeah, I am a nerd). Third period music which means that I have to carry my guitar around the entire school, the good thing about the guitar is the freedom that she is able to give you. Some people go to drugs, others to booze, I go high with music. Every time I touch one chord is like touching heaven and that heaven is the image of Jared. After my race to get to the cafeteria in time to meet with Mathias and the others part of our little cult (nerds that love rock and what the hell decided to make a band). We go to my car that is like a soccer mom's van and take a quickie ( play the guitar) dedicating every note to him.

"Kim, are you thinking about the jerk?" the best and the worst thing about Mathias is that he knows every inch of my mind. He knows all my secrets, honestly the only two that I have, my addiction to cigarettes and my obsession with Jared.

"If you know the answer, why the hell you ask?"

"Sorry, some one didn't wake up very polite."

"What? Have you been offended with my lack of education?" I asked putting the most naughty, sexy look that I have. With the only person that I have been able to make fun of my sensual side is with the geeky guy, eating gummy bears next to me.

"Ja Ja, that is funny. I don't know why you don't try to be more like that in front of Jared jerk."

"This part of me is only for you. And I won't change the way I am just because I like a boy." I am so a bad liar and Mathias knows it. He stares at me with his shrink look and start whispering in my ear.

"For my bad luck, you changed for that guy a long time ago. You think that this is you? This person in front of me is just the shell. Kim is more wonderful, beautiful and outgoing that this little costume. Maybe you aren't all shell, because sometimes you let go like when we are alone. But you have to understand that because of that jerk you try to hide."

I looked at him with a hate gaze, knowing that he is right. I have been trying to hide myself to people just because I think that I am not good enough for him. And I am not, he is a bad boy, he is a jock, he has that kind of look that reveals that you can't trust him. He is 17 like me and he has been with almost the entire population of hot girls in La Push high school. When we were freshmen he dated a senior. And like me every girl in the school melt when he decide to show that big smile. He is tall, long black hair, cocky smile, and street smart (he is too lazy for school work). He has the perfect shade of olive skin and an incredible slim, athletic body. For my luck I have him every day in my fifth hour. English, the only class that satisfy my desire just because I spend 50 minutes sitting next to his breathtaking figure.

The bell rings and I run to go to class. I hear Mattie whispering to himself how pathetic I am. I should go and hit him but that can wait until the end of school. I have the necessity to see him. I enter to class; sit in my seat in the last line in front of the teacher's desk in the third row. Everybody go into the classroom except for my dreamed Adonis. The bell rings again and I see his best friend Paul running to don't get send to the tardy room but not sight of Jared. Where is he? Why am I hyperventilating because he is not here next to me? In that moment I started to feel incomplete for the first time in my life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Don't kill me please I just want Kim to be happy in this moments.**

**The songs are here with me by Dido and how does it feel by Eskimo Joe. If you like it please tell me by a review and if you didn't well tell me by a review lol!**

Hole and then light

Pain, it's the most incredible reality prove. It makes you find every inch of emotion in your body. And I honestly hate it. I hate this. I hate being so distant and numb just because I am in pain and I don't have the courage to say it. If I go and let people see how weak I am because of him I would be scarred for life. I didn't even know him, he doesn't know my existence. He doesn't know that I breathe when I see him, that he is the only good thing in my day.

It has passed a week. I am going crazy. I have to see him. I have to know if he is ok. What is wrong with me? Maybe this is my talent, love so much. I feel like a zombie. I don't eat, I can't feel. I don't speak. I just wait. I am waiting to see his long hair go in through the classroom door. I want to feel his essence go into my brain. I want to hear his voice and the most pathetical thing is that I need those things; I need to feel his presence and I can not let him.

In some moments of the day I just want to faint, let myself fall in the darkness of my feelings. But it would be so dumb and selfish. I have to stop losing my breath every time that I think about him. I am not what people call popular, in fact I can count the people with who I socialize with the fingers of a hand and I only can trust in my old best friend. But they notice the hint of the distraction in my eyes. Through their glares I can se how lost I am.

"What the fuck Kim react. I am getting nervous here. You look lost. Kim react now!"

"I feel lost." That is the only excuse that I can give him. The truth. That is my reason why I can not even feel the wetness of my eyes (I didn't know that I was sobbing), because in the end my tears are just for fear of not seeing him again.

"Kim you have to stop this today. We will stop this today. Please pick me up today at ten." He told me this trying to give me hopes while he got out of my van.

I arrived home with a horrible feeling that something was going to change, something was changing. I felt like I was waking up of my numbness and that I wouldn't like that result. I was feeling ashamed of my situation, ashamed of what I have done to my life, ashamed of what I have become and ashamed that I have become this just for him.

I went directly to my room, took my bag and sit down in front of my mirror. And in that moment I started the monologue that was going to become that wakening of my life.

"Who the hell are you? Why is he so important to me? He is just a pitiful boy; he is everything that I hate, everything that is wrong to me. God, please give me answers. Is there a reason for this sick love? Kim look at yourself. You are a woman, a human being, you don't deserve this. He is not the core of your life. He is not the core of my life. I have to get out of this hole. Jared is my black hole. There is no reason for me hiding, his voice doesn't have to be my lullaby, his smell doesn't have to be my fragrance and his breath doesn't have to be my business. I am me and he is not part of my life and he will never be. And because that is so obvious I will start my life. I am going to start my life I will be me."

Pretty speech, right? And I believed and trust every word. In that moment I start being me but I know that I will never stop dreaming about him, get worry about him, loving him but I will leave that in a deep place of my heart because there is no reason for me dying if I don't see him. There are beautiful things around me and I will start enjoying them.

It was a really emotional reaction. I stand up of the floor and went to the bathroom. I took a shower and wash my hair. I took every hint of make up. I want to be me and natural. I took my black nail polish and went to my closet. I wanted something that makes me look pretty and happy. I decided to put on skinny jeans that I bough a few months ago and an aeropostal purple polo- shirt of my size. I spent the entire afternoon cleaning myself I took all my piercings and ( three in each ear, one in my eyebrow and one in my lip.) It was eight o'clock when I decided to go look at the mirror.

"Wow!" I really couldn't believe what I was watching. It was me and I haven't thought about Jared all those hours. Holly cra... I just did.

I went out of my room with a little giggle in my face. I felt just right. I saw my mom in the kitchen and start looking at her, staring at the way she moved around the entire kitchen.

"Oh God I didn't see you. You are a friend of Kim?" God that felt so wrong and at the same time so right she didn't recognize me without all the make up and the ponytail. I couldn't help it and I started to laugh. And in the middle of my loud giggles my mom noticed the remarkable little noise that I do when I laugh.

"Oh my lord, Kim you look fantastic. Good lord I didn't remember the beautiful face behind all the black make up. Come on we have to make a good prank on you father."

That hour is one of my best memories. I was with my parents having a great time, laughing. The best was when my dad went down to the kitchen and looked at me. His reaction was priceless. He just hugged me a told me that he was proud of me. This night was the first one in months that I had dinner with my oldies. I kissed them and went to my van to go to Mathias's house. I remembered that he told me to pick him up at ten o'clock and it was like nine fifty, before I arrived to his house I took every cigarette in the van and throw them away.

When I arrived to his drive way he was waiting for me in his porch sitting next to his cat Jim ( horrible, old cat) for the first time in a long time I wanted to look pretty in front of him so I combed my hair and took a look in the mirror.

"Hi"

"Holly crap. Who are you and thanks for what you did to Kim"

"Hey what happened with the polite thing"

"I am sorry is that I can't not believe how beautiful you are." Creepy and scary were my first thoughts. Since when Matthias thought that I was beautiful. I knew that we had a little love tension once but that was it. I was feeling honored until I started to imagine that the one that told me that I was beautiful was Jared.

"So where would you like to go?"

"Let's take a walk to the beach."

I asked him to drive and we were silent the entire time. He took some looks at me. He looked worried, like that he wanted to tell me something and he didn't know how to start.

We arrived to the beach. It was one of those warms nights. The beach was silent and the white sand floor was illuminated by the big moon. It was beautiful but even if I loved Mattie's company I wished he was with Jared.

"Why the change?" he asked anxious for an answer. He looked surprise and nervous like when he is near to one of the hot girls of school.

"Apparently you were right. I was tired, exhausted of this torturous game of hide and hide. I have the right of being me and I just waked up." I took his hand in mines and step a little closer, staring at his light brown eyes. "You made me realize what was wrong with me. I felt incomplete without a reason and I won't lie to you I still feel without a really big part of me. The pain of not knowing about him still in my heart but it's like a big gate in my mind is open for new things."

He looked at me with surprise, relieve and then with sadness.

"Just in your mind." It wasn't a question. He understood that no matter what I do, a part of me will always feel some kind of emotion towards Jared.

"Help me. Be my partner in this new journey of my life. Help me be normal, free, happy,"

I am no really sure what happened in that moment but I just felt a pair of lips on mine. They were gentle, soft but I didn't feel fireworks or sparkles I just felt a physical need of respond the kiss. I kissed him back. After I started kissing him and liking it I felt wet sand in the skin of my arms and in the back of my neck. I started blushing when I realized that some people were staring at us and laughing. They were two friends of my dad that used to go fishing near this beach. I think their names were Charlie Swan and Harry Clearwater.

"Sorry guys. Mmm we didn't want to interrupt." I took a look at the scene. Mathias was with a really proud smile on top of me. It looked that I fell down of my sitting position.

I took a deep breath and stand up so I could see the men in a better position.

"We are really ashamed, sorry I guess?" It sounded like a question. The two men said good byes to us and asked us to not be ashamed. After a few awkward minutes alone with Mathias in the silence of my van. He gave me a look and started talking.

"I wanted to talk to you about this. We have been in bad relationships, well I have been and after those experiences I always come back to you. I don't want you to feel something that you can't but just try something new and fresh with me."

I felt my mouth open and I tried to think what to say. I couldn't find the words so I just leaned towards him, kissed him in the cheek and pronounced a weird _Ok _in his ear.


	3. Chapter 3

**I have to thanks every one who tooks his/her time to read my story, I hope that you like it and please review!**

**I have to explain what is happening in this chapter. Yes! this is the chapter when he imprint! **

**Some one asked me what was the thing with Mattias: I love Kim and for me people like her deserves everything good in this world so I imagine her like this lost soul looking and dreaming about love so I gave her that with Mattias!**

**If you wonder why the name Mattias is because that is the name of my best friend. **

**I didnt upload sooner because well I was reading The Host! good book so it took me time!**

**Songs: Never alone! And i will publish this chapter in Jared's side or view!**

Empty room.

I am not really sure how to describe what have happened to me the last two weeks. But I am sure about something: what I feel for Mathias can not be compare for what I feel for Jared.

After my little love incident in the beach with Mattie, I started getting scare because that was the evidence that I was changing. I was becoming myself or trying to improve my painful shell. That weekend we talked about what we were going to try to do. We decided to start like in the movies. Some dates, dinner we our parents, going to places together. I have to confess that we did everything that we were used to do except for the kissing in my van, my room, his room and some clubs.

A weekend passed and after what it seems like an hour we were getting ready to our first school day of the week (Monday). It was really funny when my teachers didn't know who I was except for my music teacher that congratulated me. And the people around me started asking me if I was a new student. How invisible I was. One of my worries was what I was going to feel when I see him. I didn't see him and well I felt a lot. It was like a combination of regret, pain, numbness, sadness and a few ounces of doubts. Doubts about what I was doing to my best friend. I couldn't be so selfish to bringing with me to my pain because my Jared station. So I decided to pretend. Not to be fake just to pretend, to ignore the pain and the regret.

In the past two weeks I decided that my mission was to make Mattie happy.

I have gotten more action the last two weeks that in my entire life. I feel loved. Mattie has showed me that out of my comfort zone there is a world, an environment. We did what we have always done with the exception that I was feeling it. My eyes were open; my mind was concentrating in what was happening in front of me. I almost cry laughing about how Jim (Matthias's cat) fell in a hidden hole in his backyard. I heard the compliments that people gave us when we finished playing our Never alone cover in a Port Angeles bar. And I responded to every kiss that Mattie gave me.

But no matter how concentrated I was or how much I was enjoying what was around me I couldn't forget the fact that I haven't seen Jared in two weeks and six days.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

"Kim, are you and Mattie dating?" That was the good mornings that my friend Camilla gave me. I really didn't know what to tell her. I didn't even know if I was dating my best friend.

"No, why do you say that? Did he tell you something?" I didn't know that I like to gossip. I have to be honest, every moment that I had with Matthias I would dream about it and replace Mattie's face with Jared's. So in my mind I was dating him but in my heart and subconscious I was dating a man with Jared's face.

"No, he didn't tell me anything what happened is that you two are always together."

"But we always have been together."

"Yes I know. What I mean is like now you two are always getting physical and well is really gross when you see people that are like your family making out in front of you."

"Thanks for telling me I will try not to do it?" It was a question; I want to know what I can do to make my friend's lives easier.

"You don't have to stop doing it."

"Stop doing what?"

"Holly shit!"

"Hey Kim what happened?" What a stupid question, one of my talents is to be very delicate, I mean I can get scare with a boo.

"Well you scared me to death."

He kissed me in the cheek. With the corner of my eye I could see the disgust face of Camilla. At the same time that I saw her disgust face I was listening to my little logic monster yelling at me _"Kim what the hell are you doing with your life, this is the grossest thing that you have ever done. I prefer your phase of eating dirt. This just can be catalogued like incest!"_

"Hum, bye guys. I have to go…yes I have to go. See you later."

I knew the reason of Camilla fast good bye. She felt grossed like the little mini me in my head and the rest of every one around us. This unexpected fling with my best friend was like incest. It was like watching my own father with, you know pervert eyes. I know that I have needs. And don't only mean the sexual needs and thanks God that we haven't go further of the peck-kiss-make out zone. I have needs to be appreciated and loved and I need someone to fill that empty room in my heart that Jared created since the first time that I realized that he will never talk to me or know that in his English class there is this girl that breath because of him and is always drooling next to him because the simple reason that he is the most gorgeous boy ever.

"Hey little Barbie, you want to come with me?" I was so deep in my thoughts that I didn't even notice that Mattie was talking to me.

"What? Emm Barbie what?"

"God you are dumb. First I asked you if you wanted to go to the beach with me and I called you Barbie because you looked clueless."

"Hey don't call barbies like that. And yes when you want to go to the beach?"

"What about now?"

What! I have never skipped a day of school and I had some exams today. I don't know what to answer him. Hey mini me think, think, think! You are always talking to me and now you can't come with an answer._" Well I leave that to you, bigger me and think about it. It is seven in the morning; it is a really nice sunny day. I think that we have some towels and covers from the last time we went to Forks and what the hell you know that Jared won't come today."_ First I am going crazy I can talk to myself like in a daily conversation and she was right, wait I was right, what the heck I will refer to my mind as she. It is a sunny day and he won't come. Luck can not do such a bad thing to me like making Jared come the day that I am gone and if she can, we are seniors I think we can come to school before my fifth hour.

"Earth calling Kim!"

"Stop screaming in my ear. I am clueless remember? Not deaf."

"So are we going yes or no? Before with go to the beach we could stop at the 7-eleven and buy some chocolates. You know that you want a Twizt and I will invite you any candy that you want."

For some one like me that was one of the best offers in my life. You see sun, beach, candy are a perfect combination. The only thing that would be better than this would be feeling the texture of Jared's lips. _Pervert!_

"Ok, but we have to come before my fifth hour; I have some homework to give back and…" Mattie put his finger in my mouth and breathed.

"Kim just because we are trying to try to be a couple doesn't mean that I am not your best friend anymore. I know that you love that jerk and I accept it because I know that you love me too, not like him but you do love me and I appreciate your effort of trying to be happy. And I love that you are trying with me. So let's get going I am hungry and I want to feel that salty water in my head."

I haven't noticed how smart Mattie is. I couldn't lie to him so I nodded. While we jumped in my van I noticed something that I wasn't used to notice or care a lot. The way we dress is so different than other people. We were what some societies call punks or weirdoes I have heard the term emo. Mattie has long until his shoulders black hair. He puts it to one side. He was wearing a black shirt with the face of the Joker. Some baggy pants and converses. One of his arms was full of little black, red, purple and green plastic bracelets and in the other a single yellow, live strong bracelet. I in the other hand was wearing one short sleeve top with a purple hoddie and some jeans of my size. (The past couple of years I had wore size 7 and I am size 5) My hair is one of the parts of my body that I feel most proud about. It is really long, soft. A unique dark brown color, I used to wear a long ponytail that remembers me of Lara.

"So what are we going to buy? I feel like Doritos and Dr. Pepper and umm some brownies. How about you Kim?"

"Uff emmm I dunno, what about some kit-kats, a Twizt and Dr. Pepper would be nice."

"Ok, babe I will be right back."

Mattie got out of the van and went to buy our so healthy breakfast. After our stop at the 7-eleven and our karaoke version of Wanted dead or alive by Bon Jovi, we arrived to the beach. It was perfect. The wind, the light of the sun, the smell of the water, the sand in my fingers; in that moment I just wanted to swim so, well I did. I have this kind of problem that I think things after I do them. When I thought about swimming I realized that Mathias had his mouth open like a retarded and that I was taking my clothes off.

"Kim I know that it was my idea of coming to the beach but what are you doing?"

"Well, it's sunny and warm and it had passed like a year since I took a swim in the beach. So we are here lets go to take a nice, warm La Push, salty bath Babe."

"Ok, but don't call me babe."

We spent that morning laughing about our last couple of days. Swimming and playing with the water, eating junk food. Everything was great until I opened my big mouth.

"What are we? I mean, are we a couple?"

He was up, putting back his pants on his wet boxers. He sat next to me and took one of my hands. I moved to his side and stared at his light brown eyes. I have to admit that I took some glances at his physic. He is not like Jared but he has what they call a four-pack. He was blushing under his tan skin when he notices that I was observing him.

"Well I think we have always been a couple. I don't mean in a romantic way but we have always been together. Like Batman and Robin or Meredith and Christina."

"Who?"

"Shhhh. I am talking and that's Grey's anatomy. What I meant is that we are best friends. You are my partner in adventures and I love you. But in the romantic thing we are just two amateurs and that is why we are experimenting. I am attracted to you. Who wouldn't be? You are funny, smart, beautiful and for what I saw today you have a really nice body. But I have to admit that I can only see you as my best friend. So no, we are not a couple."

"So we should stop. You know the making out thing is making a lot of people sick including our parents. I think they are comparing us with Oedipus."

"That we are not a couple doesn't mean that we have to stop kissing. You were good when we started but you are getting pretty good."

"Oh my God you pervert. Come on pass me my shirt. We have to go."

"Yeah, Yeah I know. It's almost your fifth hour and you have to see if he is in school."

"You know until now I haven't thought about him since we got here."

"Man what a big mistake. So you are going to continue dreaming about him and hoping that one day he will see you and tell you how much he loves you since the day he saw you."

"Yes, I will."

"Looser."

"Sorry papi I didn't want to upset you."

"What?"

"That's daddy in Spanish, you dummy."

"Ohhhh, JaJa that was funny."

"Please let's go I wasn't kidding about the homework."

We went to my van singing a Linkin Park song. We got to school five minutes after the bell to my fifth hour rang. I was all wet and smelled like sea food. I went to the office where I received the pervert looks of the creepy janitor and the killer looks of the receptionist.

"So Ms. Books, where were you supposed to be?"

"I went to the beach. What would be another reason for my wet hair and clothes?"

"Mmm. Ok you are a senior right? I think that a fun morning is good for every one. So you need a pass for English right?"

Since when Mrs. 'I hate you all' was so nice to me. It must have been my lucky day. A wonderful morning with my best friend that is no longer my making out partner, a sunny warm day that allowed me to not wear a coat and then the horrible receptionist didn't make any trouble with my too late arrival. If it wasn't for the wet underwear that people could see from under my shirt and pants and the smelly, wet hair it would be the best day of my life.

I went back to Mattie that decided to just skipped his fifth hour (gym) and went right back to Mr. Chandler class. English. I can't deny that I was hoping to see Jared sleeping on his seat. I got in front the classroom and checked every inch of my body. I wasn't too wet, but you could see the shape of my bra under my shirt because of the water and then the smell. Not bad, but I smelled like salt and sushi.

I knocked the door grabbing the pass in my right hand and trying to cover my chest with my purse.

"Thanks, for joining us Ms. Brooks. The reception informed me that you were coming and that you would be wet because you decided to take a short morning vacation to the beach. Well for what I can see she was right. So how was the water?"

I knew that witch couldn't be so nice to me. Everyone started laughing about Mr. Chandler comment. I had my head down until none of the sudden I decided to give him back one of my sarcastic comments.

"I am so sorry if my little absence affected any one in the school, but it is not my problem if the receptionist has to be in everybody's business and had to inform you about my ways of fun."

Mr. Chandler didn't say anything he just took my pass and told me to wait there. I tried to distract myself of the comments about my response to the teacher, my wet shirt or the way my hair looked staring at the floor until I decided to do the best thing and my best way of distraction. Look at Jared and for my surprise he was there; taller, with a new short haircut, he looked stronger like that in three weeks he got like a million of muscles and he was staring back at me. His mouth was open. His eyes looked bigger than tennis balls looking at me. And his glare was like a combination of adoration and surprise and it was just for me. I looked back to see if one of the hot barbies of the school was behind me or if some kind of angel came down to earth and was next to me but there wasn't anything, he was looking at me. He was almost drooling like a dog. And I felt so perfect catching his gaze. But my mini me was there and ruined the moment asking me_ "why is Jared Najera staring at you like an idiot?"_ in that moment the happiness of his action went down the toilet or down my logic.


	4. Jared Pov

**Hey! This is my Jared's POV or whatever.**

**Please i dont want to be whiny but please can you review!**

**I feel that maybe people dont like it. If you like it review if you dont REVIEW and tell me how bad i am ans how much I SUCKED!**

**Enjoy and I wish everybody a happy life!**

Jared's side

What was the point? I had the best reason to drop school. My obligation in life was protect my tribe. I am a mythological creature. I just demand a good damn reason why some one like me has to learn who the hell was Hemingway or the different approaches of psychology. I am not normal I am a freaking werewolf!

"Just because you can bark doesn't mean that you have to be a lazy dog"

Sam how much I hate him right now and the worst thing is that he will know that I hate him when we phase. This was so unfair, I am able to change to the shape of a gigantic dog, cure my injuries in minutes, lift two hundred pound and more with a hand but I can not have privacy. I think about it over and over. I want to know if it is a fair trade.

I grunted at him picking my heavy backpack with all the work of the past three weeks, Sam almost kill me when he found out that I didn't do any of it. These couples of weeks I have been trying to figurate out how to change when I want and to not let my temper take over me. I remembered how everything happened; I arrived home from school feeling kind of sick. I felt I was going to die, my mom said that I was getting the flu or something but I didn't feel a fever just a weird heat. Then I got into a fight with Paul, he was angry with me because I was going to hook up with Danielle Johnson, one dumb cheerleader that looks too good to lose a chance like that. He yelled at me in the phone and said that he was going to my house to decided like men (play poker over the poor girl) when I saw him I wanted to explode, I couldn't be near his stupid face and I ran to the woods. I felt how my body was becoming bigger and bigger. I heard the noise of how my clothes were ripping off. Then the horrible chuckle of my wrists, my shoulders, my spine and then my skull, I tried to see my hand but they were replaced with two big, gray claws, I wasn't myself. I tried to speak but I howled. In that moment I decided to run away of that horrible nightmare. I started running and running until I heard Sam's voice.

"Don't run away, I can explain what is happening to you. Come back."

His voice was passive at first. He sounded like a dentist. He is nice to you at first. He always promises you a lollipop after the seizure but then he takes your teeth.

"What the fuck? Who the hell are you? Go away I don't want to be near any one. I am going no matter who you are or who is against it."

And then the voice, it was worse than when my dad used to yell at me. I felt that I have to obey that voice. After I realize that I had to follow the voice. Sam told or explained to me everything. We were the protectors of the Quileute tribe; we have to defend our town from the cold ones (vampires) and he showed every single part of how had been his life since he found out that he was a werewolf. Something about imprinting, my new chores; in other words he told me that we were werewolves, that we fall in love with some one and we would forget about anything else of our lives because that person and that I have to obey every single one of his words. Nickname of my new life: Crap!

He took me to school. I felt really weird while he was driving. I felt like an eight-year-old child. Since the day of my change or "birth" how some crazy person next to me like to call it, I have been literally living with him. After he found me he talked to my mom and explained to her the new late puberty changes that I was going through and she understood. I never believe that she like our tribe's folklore. He parked in front of theLa Push high school entrance.

"I will pick you up at 2:45 sharp, ok?"

"Yes don't forget that I drank all my Kool-aid and that I need new underwear."

"Stop with the sarcasm. If you do well this week you will go back to your normal life."

"Yeah right, except that I bark and have a tail."

"Good bye kid."

High school always has been like my sin city, the place that embraces me the feeling and the rush of doing the wrong thing. I am known as the bad boy. Not the bully, but that boy that everyone thinks that is cool, the girls love and the guys want to be friends because my effect with the chicks. I am in my senior year and even before I entered to high school Mr. Arias (principal) knew about me. My freshman year I got sent to Mr. Arias's office sixteen times. Skipping, cheating, inappropriate behavior with a female student, pranks, fights. Name it and I have done it. But now my common sin city has become my prison. I don't understand how a creature like me has to be in a place so irrelevant and superficial and the lamest thing is that I was part of all this high school stupidity.

I go through the staircase at the entrance I can feel, hear the reactions of my arrival. Near me I see how a huge, blue van with loud music goes to the school's gates, at least some one won't have to stand this boring, sunny day. I know what people must be thinking 'oh, he looks gigantic!' or 'he must be on drugs'. After all I have been trough these couples of weeks I don't even care if they doubt about my sexuality or gender.

La Push high school is like the perfect example of all those stupid teen comedy movies like American Pie or Heathers. Everything is about with who do you hang out, with did you hook up and everything is divided in clichés. The nerds, the jocks, the cool guys, the cheerleaders and my favorites to stare at the weirdoes; I am in the group of the cool guys/bad boy/ every girl wants me/ adventurous. If someone asks why they catalogued me as adventurous and sometimes call me Indiana Jones is because I like foreign territory. I have a friend in every kind of group that you can find in the campus and I have hook up with at least one of their female members except for the weirdoes. Those are just like my personal pieces of art in my mind museum.

For the first time I miss my stupid, obnoxious best friend Paul. He just became a wolf three days ago and he has been having a really hard time trying to control his volatile temper. I swear that guy has phased like twenty times in a weekend.

"Hey Jared." I recognize the voice and the scent, is Danielle.

"Ugh, Hi." What is happening with me? Just because I became a gigantic dog doesn't mean that I have to lose my charm. But I have to admit that I don't feel anything when she smile at me with a really wicked glare and push me to one corner of the hallway. I try to push her back but I can feel her hand goes from my neck to the top of my waist and takes its path down to my friend. I grab her wrist and stare at her with confuse eyes.

"What are you doing?"

"What Jared. Didn't you miss me?" I can not say yes. I have been very busy learning how not to explode into a ball of fur in front of people to be thinking in my reproductive organ need for female companion.

"I thought you were hanging out with Paul."

"You know that I don't have an owner. If I like what I see I take it." And that was the moment when I see her hand going through the middle of my tights.

"Hey stop!" I realize that we were alone in the hallway so that meant that my first hour just started.

"We had something. We did some things but that doesn't mean that you can take me to a dark corner and grab what you want. I feel raped."

She rolled her eyes and took three steps back. She looked beautiful but that didn't make me think the perversions and fantasies that watching her pale, thin, voluptuous body normally made me think.

"Ok, I don't really understand. You have never rejected me or feel weird when I touch you. Most of the time you are the one harassing me, whatever, when your violated virgin illness pass give me a call and tell Paul that I miss him."

I stared at her and I couldn't feel anything. Maybe this werewolf thing make you lose your ability of get, well a reaction form down there. But I have seen Sam's almost pornographic memories of Emily.

I took a breath and decided not to go to class. I was like thirty minutes late. And that moment with the sensual Danielle was the only thing in my mind for that morning. Why I didn't like the sensation of her hands all over my body of her heat next to mine. I was thinking so hard but I couldn't find an answer. I went all the way to my fifth hour ignoring every gaze or any opinion. I didn't care what any one had to say about me. I changed a lot and I wasn't able to think in such vain things like gossip.

I went directly to my seat. Third row, last line in front of Mr. Chandler's old desk; I decided to take a nap or just take a rest, I knew I would have a long afternoon with Paul and Sam. Almost ten minutes after the last bell rang the speakers of the class room started talking.

"Excuse me."

"Yes?" Mr. Chandler has the strangest, most intimidating voice I have ever heard.

"Mr. Chandler, this is the receptionist, umm one of your students is going to your class room right now. It seems that she decided to skipped school today."

What a bitch!' I though. Why she had to inform that. I still had my yes close and my head between my arms.

"Who is the student?"

"Kimberly Brooks."

"Are you kidding me? She is straight As student!"

"Well she took a little time to herself. I have to warn you she is all wet. She told me that she went to the beach this morning. If you have problems with her current state please send her to the office so we can get her some towels or send her home."

"Ok, thanks for the warning."

"You are welcome."

I was laughing inside. Wow a nerd that decided to break the rules. I decided to make myself more comfy, I knew that Mr. Chandler wold give her a hard time, I might take a nap in that time. I really didn't want to hear more comments. I could hear some girls whispering.

"I really don't understand what happened to that Kim, she has been seen making out with her best friend everywhere and some say that she and her little nerd cult smoke pot in her soccer mom van."

A soccer mom van, it must have been the one that pass near me this morning. I though. I heard some of the guys behind me.

"I don't know what is happening with people in this school but I want to be part of IT. First Jared disappeared for three weeks, and then the weirdo comes to school looking freaking hot and making out with that other weirdo. I tell you man, if I have a chance I would sleep with that Kim girl. I remember that she wore all that black clothes, but now she looked like a cheerleader. I really want a piece of the goth girl."

It first made me curious. I was surprise of what have happened when I wasn't here. A nerd became sexy in my absent. Umm I would like to see that. And then I heard the door opening and the comments of my classmates.

"Oh My frigging God. I told you that she was hot!"

"What a whore. You can see her bra under that wet shirt and look at her hair."

"Thanks, for joining us Ms. Brooks. The reception informed me that you were coming and that you would be wet because you decided to take a short morning vacation to the beach. Well for what I can see she was right. So how was the water?"

God teachers are so nasty. Why in the world the have to ask about our personal lives? In that moment I decided to look what the girl would say and then. BOOM. Fireworks, stars, small brown eyes, dark long hair, tall figure, my heart started to beat so hard I though I was having a heart attack.

"I am so sorry if my little absence affected any one in the school, but it is not my problem if the receptionist has to be in everybody's business and had to inform you about my ways of fun."

I felt how my mouth fell open when I heard her voice. She was the most amazing thing I have ever seen. She looked down for a moment and then while biting her bottom lip see decided to take a look at someone so insignificant next to her (me). I have never think that God exist bit in that moment that our eyes connected I believed in that supernatural being. She was an angel. I felt how I started drooling but I didn't care I just wanted to stare at the most unbelievable creation of Mother Nature: Kim.

I started shaking. For the first time in my changed life I felt that I was going to phase not because of anger. I could feel the howl in my throat; my nose started asking for that smell, a combination of sun, water and her. I inspected with my eyes, realizing that every inch of her body was perfect. Tall, olive skin, chocolate eyes, perfect cheeks, full lips, long neck, thin body, perfect breasts. I could see the shape of her cotton bran under her black top. Long abdomen, curves like a pear. Miles and miles o legs and a small waist.

I started getting a reaction that wasn't really appropriated for a high school. I was getting too excited. I wanted to kiss those full lips, touch those perfect breasts. In other words I haven't felt my friend so excited never in my life. She smiled at me wondering if I was ok. And it came, those smiles made me explode.

I stand up, took a long look at her and ran to the nearest bathroom. What I was experimenting in that moment was what they call wet dreams. When I controlled myself I started thinking about what was happening. I felt an ache inside because I wasn't near her. I got out of the nasty high school bathroom and ran outside. I was kind of desperate I didn't understand what was happening to me. I just couldn't help my feelings towards her.

I went to the woods. I wanted to run but I knew that if phased, Sam would find me. I ran until I got to the beach thinking just about her. And everything came like a bomb of memories in my head. She was Kimberley Brooks, the daughter of Kyle and Lillian Brooks, they were travel agents. She was known as one of the strangest things in La Push. The rumor was that her parents used to leave her alone in their house since she was fourteen so she started doing random stuff. She got caught smoking in the school campus. She was like me but for the weirdoes and for the people of the tribe she was in a satanic cult. I remembered her singing in the parking lot with a group of nerds that were part of my collection of art. I remember the time that Paul asked me if I would sleep with her and I told him that I would. I remembered the time that I caught her staring at me in English class and the time when she wore a black blouse and I took a look at her cleavage.

I felt disgusted with myself because everything is my life was involves in vanity and sex. She was one of the people that I always wondered how would be live her life. She was smart, beautiful, and different, she was my soul mate, my imprint, she was my life and I was more than happy with that.


	5. Chapter 4

**I have to start saying SORRY for the grammar and the spelling of Jared's POV I was in a rush.**

**Please REVIEW I don't know if I should continue with this. Well this is chapter 4. Enjoy and have a happy life.**

Chapter 4

Weird, creepy, strange, Kim

I don't want to move a thing if it change a memory. I just can't forget those eyes that glared in surprise, devotion, happiness. They were the same eyes that I have had since I saw him. I know that maybe I dreamt it or I hit something in the ocean or I got too much water in my ears but it looked so real, it was real. I didn't sleep, I couldn't breath. Just thinking that maybe, maybe those eyes were looking at me. It made my life complete for what could be my whole life.

The night of the best Monday of my life was a torture; I couldn't wait to go to school, to feel his presence, to smell his cologne, to listen to his whispers.

Every time I think about that glare I came up with a new theory about imagination. That maybe that talent, the prestige of being able to create things in our heads for our personal pleasure is just a way of God making fun of us. That those desires in the deepest spot of our hearts are release of their chains and let loose in a lake of imagination, but in a certain time it seems so real, so perfect that you just can't wait to prove its origin. And that is the point when God just laugh at you. When you wake up and realized that everything was your playful imagination. But since that day, that moment that we connected our eyes I haven't woken up, I haven't crashed with the big wall of reality where I am the nerd and he is the popular kid.

"Good morning my dark sunshine" Tuesday morning and I just can not quit my ear to ear smile.

"So, mom what are you doing here?"

"I want to talk to you." Oh no! What could she possible want to tell me? Maybe the sex talk that she never gave me or the responsibilities or something that parents are suppose to tell their kids. I am just scared.

"About what?"

"I am just curious about you Kim. I know that I have never been there for you but I can see a change in you and I just want to know. Just mother curiosity."

"Mom don't say that, we talked about this a million times. I decided this style of life because I love you. No matter what every one say, I am happy with what we have done."

"Honey, I know that this was something that we decided together but you know that I miss you everyday. And I just want to know what is making my little princess of the darkness so happy."

She reached my face with one of her soft, travel agent hands. Every time my mother touched a part of my body shiver of excitement at how warm and safe it made me feel. I made my parents fight for their dreams but I can't deny that I miss them.

XxXxXxXxXxXx

"What was that about?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Since when does your mom wait for you in the morning?"

He was talking about how I had my first breakfast with a member of my family in more than a year. Deep in conscience I knew that these changes on my image and my behavior would make her pay attention but what she told me wasn't an annoying parent's talk like I though it was going to be instead it was something that made me rate how much I really love her. To know how much she regrets her dream is almost hurtful but flattering. That conversation was so unexpected to me that it made me not think about Jared for a few hours.

"So are _you _going to tell me, sparkling black spot?"

"What did you call me?"

"Ohh, it just a funny story. Don't listen to me."

_Don't listen to me _in other words I did something that I wasn't suppose to do and it involves you. The scene next to me was for my bad luck and peace of mind too much known. Matthias was like that brother that I never had or the love of my life if Jared weren't alive. But that little embarrassment in his voice and his guilty look only meant one thing.

"With. Who. Did. You. Sleep. Last. Night. And. Talked. About. Me?"

In that moment we were entering the La Push High School's gates. I could feel the anger in my throat; my only desire was to kill that guy next to me.

"Matthias how many times I have told you not to talk about me!! I leave you alone for a night and in less than 24 hours you could become a dad or the next star in Gossip Girl!"

"First of all, I used a condom my dear, second of all I just mentioned to a girl how much you didn't care about the jerk and to finish this act of sharing words since when do you watch Gossip Girl?"

God how much I love and hate this guy. I parked the car in my normal spot. Close enough to the doors of the art building and far enough to be able to take a quickie (a cigarette or play the guitar.) I could hear how my knuckles were trying to pass my olive, tan skin. I felt the venom in my tongue.

"Ok and why did you call me sparkle of black spot, babe?"

The little brat couldn't stare at me for more than 3 seconds. I knew that he was nervous. He betrayed me and I had attitude. This was like 2 plus 2 equals 4. In this case if you tell something about my secret you will pay with blood. He started biting his black nail and talked to the window.

"Well babe I kind of told Camille and Josh and Luna how depressed you used to get because Jared jerk and well how much you used to drink black vodka when you were in your anxiety/depression stage and how when you were too much wasted you started exclaiming that you could see sparkles around you. And that is the reason why I called you sparkling black spot?"

I could see Camille and Josh coming to my van. I grabbed my coffee and took a sip. I knew that some people would be able to be witness of crazy angry Kim but I didn't care. I looked at mirror and then to Matthias. His eyes were sad and tired cause his lucky night. In the other hand my eyes were red with rage and desire to kill. I felt like the terminator or the crazy guy of the movie Perfume. I took a big breath knowing that I was going to fight. I broke my coffee cup in my hands and on top of Matthias's lap.

"Shit Kim. That burns, what the hell are you thinking?"

"Get out right now if you don't want me break the little pervert that you call penis. Get out."

"Babe, I was wasted; you know that I don't even remember my name when I drink a little too much."

"Don't remember your name? Well my dear asshole you won't need a name anymore after I kill you. GET OUT!"

He got out of the car; I got out of the car. I run after him, I hit him in head. He started complaining. Camille and Josh were around us laughing but at the same time trying to

Stop the fight.

"Kim you are not like this. Remember peace and love."

"Shut up Josh. I know that you would love to live in the sixties but this is the 21 century. A girl is allowed to kill her stupid best friend."

Another scratch to his tan face, I started listening to the whispers of the people that were coming towards us.

"Kim, think about it. If you kill him you will regret it, you know that you love this little piece of crap."

"Hey I am here."

"SHUT UP"

"Camille, Josh I know that you love this little _imbecile_ but he did something and he deserves to pay for that, so please let me kill him."

"Wait! what did he do?"

I knew that Camille would understand me. My reasons were more than right. Every one around my little fight stopped whispering and talking about how much I was going to hurt him.

"Camille come here."

I saw how Matthias took a deep breath knowing that this meant his final one until I finished hurting him. _Geez I didn't know that we could be so aggressive_. I stopped my death looks and leaned towards her. Camille looked really beautiful but I could see the dark spot under her blue eyes, evidence of her party night and after I was close enough to talk in her ear I could smell the beers and the drugs. Camille was wise but wild.

"Don't you remember what he told you about my secret love yesterday." It was less than a whisper, she took a few steps back and looked at me, and I knew that she understood. She took a long, deep look at Matthias and smiled at me.

"People, please take a few steps, there will be blood. Kill him for me too."

I smiled at her and looked at my too tired friend.

"Kim before you kill me can I tell you how much I love you and how sorry I am for what I said and that I would love to be your friend after you finish and let me with only a few bones to be able to breath."

"Mattie, my little Mattie. It only will be a few broken bones and some blood and yes you will still my best friend."

"What the hell? Aren't you going to take the shit out of him?"

It looked like people were enjoying my rage act; I grabbed Matthias by his long black hair and took him to my van until I felt it. A pair of long, big, warm arms around my waist, a husky, sexy voice in my ear that whispered "_Kim, calm down."_ Was this Matthias's guardian angel or another prank of God and my imagination? This was the voice that had become a lullaby to me. This was Jared's.

I took a look at my friends that were with their mouth hanging open. Camille was smiling like she was staring at the end of a good chick flick. She winked at me like approving what was going to happened.

"Every one go away. This is nothing of you business."

He shouted in my ear _oww that was loud, bigger me_. After every one was gone except of Camille, Matthias, Josh and the sex god grabbing me by my waist, I couldn't help but I melted. This was the first time in years that I had contact with this guy. I wanted to faint; I could smell his spicy, fresh fragrance. I could feel the warmness of his breath is my ear and how his breathing accelerated every time his arms were near my breasts or how tight his arms were like he didn't want to release me.

I was getting anxious in my new position but I couldn't stop loving how our bodies were touching. Minutes passed and It seems like he didn't want this moment to end. Every one was staring and then I heard how he place his face in my hair and took and a long breath. Matthias started giggling and then Camille and I couldn't stop either. Jared Najera, the bad boy, the most popular boy in school, the so called Indiana Jones just smelled my hair like he was consuming cocaine. It was just hilarious. In that moment I heard the bell and decided to cut our trance.

"Jared, could you let me go, please? I swear I won't kill him."

Every one moved their heads like trying to forget a bad memory or wake up. Every one understood what I asked him but he didn't release me.

"What did you say?" his sexy voice sounded surprised, like he had seen a pig flying or a dog talking.

"That I won't kill him?" _Kim way to go, now you are into sarcasm. _Stop mini me!

"No you said my name, please say it again."

"Dude, are fucking high?" Matthias another reason for your death.

"Seriously dude, sorry 'Jared' are you ok?" He took another deep breath on my hair and put me on my feet. I can't deny that I felt kind of incomplete. Being held so close to his exceptional figure was hypnotizing.

"I am sorry; Kim is that, umm well you smell so good like a mix of…"

"Of what? Hahaha. Cigarettes, coffee and alcohol. Oh babe I am telling you, everything in your life is weird. Every one around you is or you make them creepy like Mr. German shepherd here and then you are just freaking strange. Oh my lady you are just the best piece of art in a weird, dark world. Hahaha."

In that moment I couldn't stop. I wanted to kill him, take out his brown eyes and eat them, then cut his tongue and sell it on eBay. I just wanted to strangulate him. But I couldn't because something grabbed my hands a put then on my back. From the touch I could know that my sexy Adonis was the one stopping me of going to prison at seventeen.

Camille opened her mouth as trying to say something to make me relax but apparently I was starting to relax. Every time that Jared touched me I could breath and forget everything at all. I just though about the heat, the shivers that his hot touch sent to my stomach and the gasp of air that I started needing, because I felt like dreaming in wonderland.

"Mattie, dear imbecile, lets go, we should leave Kim to relax and we should wait to see if she is going to finish you undeserved existence."

You go girl, take him. Leave me alone with the guy of my dreams and make the clown shut his fucking mouth. But as always the clown had to open his big, fat mouth.

"No way. I am not going to leave Kim alone with the resemble of Jason grabbing her."

"Matthias please get out of my sight before I become your personal Freddie Krueger."

In that second I just jumped towards Matthias listening to a small laughter behind me. I could feel the movement of his chest while he stared at the funny scenario.

Four nerds around a blue, soccer mom van; one looking slightly as a hippie with long blond hair, a band around his head, big cop glasses and big tan colors clothes. The other one a small female, with big blue eyes, long black hair, black spots under her eyes and the same clothes that she wore the day before. But the real attraction of this freak show was the tall, thin, tan girl with a pair of baggy pants and a I LOVE NEW YORK t- shirt, punching and scratching the live La Push version of a young tan Ozzy Osbourne.

I growled really loud, maybe it sounded like a scream but It was my way to warned the world that I was going to one of my meltdowns and in the eyes of my friends it was just for a stupid mistake that my drunk best friend had done but I could feel that behind my scream there was a bigger reason, some kind of guilt and pain of the unknown until today. I was like a newborn in front of many spiritual eyes in my little, dark bubble, I was getting to know something new. And I thought about him. Not Jared or Matthias or my parents. I thought about the friend that I lost a few years ago the one that made me understand my love.

I put my hands on my knees and sliced next to my van. I looked at Mattie and pleaded him with my eyes to leave me alone. He nodded and started making my other friends pay attention to him. Maybe he was an asshole but he understood me.

"Well my friends, this is getting a _little_ annoying. Shall we go to our classes?"

He was talking to Camille and Josh that saw a small tear sliding on my face, and then he turned to Jared that hold a surprise look locked on his face. _Great now he thinks we are mentally disable._

"You too Indiana boy" I could identify the anger in Matthias's face. Like me, like everyone he didn't understand what was happening to the pretty boy.

"Don't worry bat boy I am going to stay a while here. I need something from my car."

I knew that he was lying. His voice was dead. Matthias took a last look at me before joining Camille and Josh that were in the doors of the art building. I stayed there, waiting for something to make me respond to my surroundings. I could hear birds, the wind. I could smell the cold, fresh air but then the heat. The incredible comforting heat of peace and perfection was next to me. The magical honey eyes were expecting something from me. He held my hand, grabbed my chin to make me look straight at his eyes and with the most ridiculous worried voice I could feel his breath crashing mine. Only three words came out of his mouth.

"Are you ok?"

**I want to say thanks to the next amazing people that told me what the thought about my little interpretation of this couple:**

**SleppyHeather**

**Embrya.'sLover**

**Littlefoot1394**

**Midnightsun000**

**Thanks!!!!!!!!**

**If you are wondering what I am reading. Well I just finished this really nice nook called "what happened to Cass McBride" and I am reading the uglies saga. And then I am going to start with more books that I don't really know what they are about but the lady of my school's library just love to give them to me.**

**REVIEW and tell me if you read The host and if you like it. **

**Like Josh would say Peace and Love.**


	6. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

**Jared POV**

**Her behavior, her emotions, her world**

**Water is my eye  
most faithful my love  
feathers on my breath  
teardrop on the fire of a confession  
feathers on my breath  
most faithful my love  
feathers on my breath  
Teardrop on the fire  
feathers on my breath**

**Teardrop by Massive attack**

Like a five-year-old that tasted some rice krispies for the first time I wanted more. I needed more. I needed to know everything about her, her birthday, her favorite color, her hobbies, the taste of her lips, and the texture of her silky olive skin. I need to know her.

After the release of all my manhood in the school's bathroom and my run to the beach I designed my plan. My project and my mission of life; I called it "How to make Kim happy."

Feeling the urge to know everything about the most wonderful girl in the world I decided to get in touch with one of my contacts. I was walking in the street towards Emily's house when I called her.

"Umm, Em, could you help me with something?"

Emily was Sam's imprint. She was one of the most beautiful women that I have ever met. She was pretty in the physical way but what made her so gorgeous was the way she took every disastrous change in her life. She fell in love with her cousin's fiancée, then got together with her cousin's fiancée, she took really well that well her boyfriend that was her cousin's ex- fiancée, ex-high school sweetheart was a werewolf. And her love for Sam made her forget and accept how in one of his explosions he lost his temper and scarred her for life. You could become a green alien with five head and she would understand it. In the end if God is aware that we exist, I think that he put her in our life to make us feel normal and part of something.

"Hey, Jared where are you? Sam told me that Paul called and he said that you ran away form school? What happened?"

"Well, Em it is kind of personal and, umm could I talk to you for a minute alone?"

"Of course come home, I made some blueberry muffins and your favorites chocolate cookies."

"Ok. Thanks Em."

"Don't worry. I just want the best for my boys."

After practicing how I was going to explain to my almost second mom how I imprinted and how my heart was dying, burning because it didn't know anything of Kim. I arrived at the little wood house porch. With a big, fake grin, I knocked the door and heard how Emily walked through her small hallway to open the door for me.

"So, Jared how can I help you with something else that isn't feeding you?"

I took a seat in front of her in her kitchen table and sighed at what I thought was relieve but at the same time confusion that was wondering in my mind. So I just started talking.

"Em, I imprinted. She is the most freaking beautiful thing that I have ever seen. She is so perfect. Her voice is like the entrance song of the gates in heaven. Listen to me; I am even being poetic because that is what she makes me do. Her chocolate eyes, I swear her eyes are the same color of brownies. Her olive, silky skin and her body, she is just unbelievable extraordinary. She is the eight wonder of planet earth. Em I love Kim Brooks."

I heard her giggles at my current position. What was supposed to be my love confession became like a political speech. I had one of my feet in her chair. One of my hands in my chest and the other one hanging in the air, I looked like the freaking statue of liberty.

"Don't laugh at me. I am serious." I took my seat and took her two hands in mines.

"It is like waking up for the first time, like being born. When I phased for the first time I felt how my senses were better than human's. How I could see every perfect detail. But this Em, it was like everything around me disappeared and the only thing that I could see was her. Every pore of her face, each one of her long feather eyelashes, her perfect teeth; and now I feel so bad about myself because I never saw the beauty sitting next to me in English for the past couples of months or maybe even more. It hurts Em; it is like something is burning inside of me that plead for her. I want to know information of her life. I just need her."

"My friend, now you can understand what does it means being in love. I know everything that is happening in your heart, like a giant, crazy rollercoaster. It just continues and continues and you can not stop it."

"Do you know anything about her?"

"Ha, Kim Brooks known as the future juvie. You really don't know anything about Kimberly Brooks?"

"Well, umm I know she is the daughter of two travel agents and she is kind of weird, what I mean she is not like the other kids in La Push."

"Well you know the most important thing; she is not like any one in this silly town. I met her; she is nice, polite and really smart. She is like a nerd. But ha-ha you imprinted in one of a kind Jared, she has this little band called Elmo. They play in Port Angeles."

"Why did you call her the future juvie?"

"Oh, it is because the rumors. Umm her parents work really hard and for that reason they have a really successful business, but when Kim was fourteen they started leaving her alone. Some say that she lived by her own, so with the departure of her parents she started hanging out with strange people of Forks and other towns. And then it happened."

"What happened?"

"You seriously don't know what happened with Kim and her friends four years ago?"

"No, that was the time when my dad was diagnosed with cancer. I didn't go to school for a few weeks in my freshman year and then I started getting in trouble and things like that. You know that she is not the kind of people that I used to hang out but I remember that one day she and her friends were called from the principal's office, something involved with the police."

"Jared, when Kim was fourteen years old she got in car accident. One of her friends died. He was sixteen and used to live in Forks. I don't remember his name, but Kim was the one driving the car because she was the only one that wasn't drunk. But you know how the highways are, everything was wet, she got distracted and crashed. Since that day, because of her clothes, her behavior and the accident some people refer to her as the future juvie."

"So people think that she killed the guy."

Emily nodded her head. Learning that behind what I though just was a fashion statement was a big dark past was just overwhelming. I wanted to punch all the people that though she killed that guy. I wanted to comfort her, to let her know that I love her and that she didn't do anything.

After my conversation with Sam and Paul, I got a broken nose and a guide of how make Kim noticed me. The broken nose was thanks to Paul that with his comments of how I imprinted in the emo girl like he called her I phased two times to fight with him. I didn't care about any kind of commentary. The only thing that matter was Kim.

The next morning I was kind of glowing. My mom got scared and asked me if I was doing any kind of drugs. The smile on my face looked like the one of the joker: hysterical and hiding desperation. I needed to see her like I needed to breathe.

I got to school going directly to the side of the parking lot when I had seen her blue van. Something was happening; a big crowd was surrounding her usual place. You only could see the top of the van. From my car I could hear the whispers of the 'public' and the screams of plead of her friends. It sounded like she was in a fight.

"Kim you are not like this. Remember peace and love."

"Shut up Josh. I know that you would love to live in the sixties but this is the 21 century. A girl is allowed to kill her stupid best friend."

When I heard how she wanted to kill somebody I couldn't stop the curiosity. What in the world some one could do to make my angel want to kill a human?

Then I heard something like an answer.

"Don't you remember what he told you about my secret love yesterday?"

"People, please take a few steps, there will be blood. Kill him for me too."

'There will be blood' in that moment I knew that I couldn't let her do whatever she was thinking to do. I ran towards the commotion of people and I felt the same thing I felt the day that I saw her. She was just too beautiful. You could see the red in her cheeks maybe because the screaming and how some tears were rising in her eyes. Her hair was just the most fantastic mess, some in her face. Just with her movement she took my breath away.

"Kim before you kill me can I tell you how much I love you and how sorry I am for what I said and that I would love to be your friend after you finish and let me with only a few bones to be able to breathe."

"Mattie, my little Mattie. It only will be a few broken bones and some blood and yes you will still my best friend."

"What the hell? Aren't you going to take the shit out of him?"

I couldn't stop myself; I didn't want her to get hurt taking the shit out of the little embarrassment of men lying on the floor. I had to laugh she knew how to hit hard. The poor guy was full of blood going out of his nose, scratches and bruises. Some kind of hot liquid was in his clothes. Ohh coffee. I fought in the tumult of people to get behind her. From my direction I could see every curve of her back and her abdomen and her waist. I had to touch her. When she was leaning to grab the guy's hair I just went and lifted her.

"Kim calm down." it was just a whisper. Her black hair was in my face. It smelled like green apples and oak tree. I took a look at her friends, their mouths were wide open like they were staring at Jesus, I could smell and hear the drool of the guy with the long, light hair. I didn't take any more of my precious seconds touching Kim by looking at the humans around us.

I closed my eyes to try to imagine that in that moment Kim and I were alone. I yelled "_every one go away. This is nothing of your business." _I noticed how my scream affected her and I felt angry with myself, it looked that I almost made her deaf. After what seemed 2 straight minutes, we were alone in the parking lot except for the freak show that she calls friends (that was so racist).

The smell of her hair was just plain genius; the perfect combination of apples and woman. I couldn't restrain myself, I just couldn't stop my nose to dig in those perfect black curls, and I am not sure if sniff or just took a big breath. I smelled her. The mixture of citrus and womanhood inundated my nostrils and in that precise moment I preyed, I asked, I begged God to make this piece of art love me. To say hello to me, to just acknowledge my existence, to just let me be with her in any way.

And then the giggles!

Those little giggles that I could feel how they got out of her body.

"Jared, could you let me go, please? I swear I won't kill him."

Her voice, oh God her voice I swear I have never heard something so pretty, secure, confident, knowing but at same time obscure, sad and ominous. She said my name, I didn't deserve it. What in this world have I done to have this lady on my arms say my name? I couldn't help; I am too selfish that I needed her to say it again, like the air, like oxygen like water. My ears were begging for her voice and my mind was dying to know what made her so unhappy. Unwilling I took out my face of her hair and looked how her friends shook her head in unison, like getting of a trance.

"What did you say?" I am such a bastard; I made myself sound confuse to see if she could pronounce my name. In that moment I was open to just the first letter.

"That I won't kill him?" Ha ha she sounded so funny. I hate when she talks about that Korn renegade. I would kill him if it wasn't for the way she looks at him. Maybe he is a jackass but that jackass has the love of my Kim.

"No you said my name, please say it again."

"Dude, are fucking high?" Whatever his name was, it was just another reason for his death.

"Seriously dude, sorry 'Jared' are you ok?" Definitely that was my call; I saw how her friends were looking at us. And in a way the picture was very strange like out of a Tim Burton's movie, I mean look at this: a really big dude grabbing a tall beautiful girl that from a distance you could say that the big dude was grabbing the pretty lady's boobs and in front of them a fan of Kurt Cobain/peace maker holding hands with an emo version of Hannah Montana, I mean you really can not ask more for a freak show. We looked like Cirque Du freak.

"I am sorry; Kim is that, umm well you smell so good like a mix of…"

"Of what? Hahaha. Cigarettes, coffee and alcohol. Oh babe I am telling you, everything in your life is weird. Every one around you is or you make them creepy like Mr. German shepherd here and then you are just freaking strange. Oh my lady you are just the best piece of art in a weird, dark world. Hahaha."

In that moment I didn't understand how life was planned. How that condom incident became Kim's best friend. If it wasn't for her I swear I would have killed him. I couldn't destroy his life. In just seconds I thought in the several ways that I am able to kill that asshole just with 2 fingers until I heard a growl coming from Kim. She sounded angry, I saw how she was going to hit him again but I went behind her and held her arms behind her back.

"Mattie, dear imbecile, lets go, we should leave Kim to relax and we should wait to see if she is going to finish you undeserved existence."

You go emo girl! Thanks for being the only one that can sense how much I want to be alone with Kim and for taking the clown out of my face. But like always clowns can't have their mouths shut. And this particular clown that in a way looked more like a Quileute version of the joker didn't know the meaning of silence.

"No way. I am not going to leave Kim alone with the resemble of Jason grabbing her."

"Matthias please get out of my sight before I become your personal Freddie Krueger."

She growled. It was so funny how she tried to get out of my embrace to hit the asshole again. I let out a subtle chuckle.

She growled again but I know it was a scream. It was so painful, so undeserved. Behind that scream that was pleading for privacy and peace I noticed, I just knew that in her life there were many hindrances stopping her for her happiness. I have never wanted to cry so bad in my life. To know that the most amazing person in the planet is not happy is just depressing. I died when I saw her sliced next to her car, with her hands in her knees. She looked so sad and full of knots, of things that begged for a solution. I felt so much envy when she lifted her head and looked at Matthias's eyes. Just with one look, he understood her. It was like their language. In that moment I wanted to be him, to know what was happening.

"Well my friends, this is getting a _little_ annoying. Shall we go to our classes?"

"You too Indiana boy" He looked at me with such hate. I really don't know why, but the way he understood her and looked at her with so much knowledge of her feelings made me make an excuse, it was something like what I felt towards Sam but this guy gained

a little of my respect just for the envy that I felt for his knowledge.

"Don't worry bat boy I am going to stay a while here. I need something from my car."

I was lying and for the way that Kim looked at me I knew that she noticed my lie. I saw her tear and I promised for all I have in my life that I would stop every single tear of her life. The three humans that in less that an hour gained my respect and my envy just took a last glare at their friend and in their eyes I could tell how they thought that leaving her alone was the best answer. They went to the art building and I heard her sobs. Her sobs were daggers in my neck. I took a deep breath and sat next to her. She moved towards me and looked at my eyes, at my face. She didn't know but in a way we were doing the same thing; checking if we were real. I looked at her lips; she looked at mine and I just whispered:

"Are you ok?"


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

**Let's have a conversation**

**Teardrop by Massive Attack again and Nude by Radiohead**

"Are you ok?"

I have never seen someone so devastated in my life, and to see that the person that is just dying in front of you is the love of your life is unbelievably painful.

"Leave me alone, please just leave alone."

She stood up and looked at her surroundings, she looked desperate.

"Kim please look sit down ok? Come talk to me please just stop doing that."

I was sitting next to her van, begging her to just stop hurting herself, the way her eyes looked dead and the way her coordination was completely random was killing me. Staring at the love of your life while she is going into a panic attack is deadly. I stood up and followed her; she had this kind of pattern walking fast between her car and the jeep next to it. She stopped and pulled me into her van. I heard how she tried to control her sobs.

"Stop doing what?! Just answer me. What do you think that because you helped me somehow I have to do what you say? Fuck you Jared, fuck everyone. Just leave alone."

I grabbed her by her arms and stared intensely at her chocolate eyes. She was so beautiful but the woman in front of me was collapsing.

"Stop hurting yourself and by doing that stop hurting me! Please?"

With that sentence I found her Achilles tendon. She took a last glare at me and run towards the driver seat of her van.

"Kim what are doing? Please talk to me!"

"Listen you want to talk to me, get in and just stop whining."

I followed her instructions like a trained puppy. This was just fucking ironic. While she drove out of the school I decided to take a glance at her car. Definitely she had a band, the intense smell of cigarettes, coffee and booze was excruciating but it didn't come from her.

From her I could feel the fragrance of fruits behind a sublime cloud of Marlboros and dunkin donuts coffee. Her face had this kind of crimson color behind its cheeks like she was embarrassed. She was looking for something and couldn't find it. She looked from her Panic! at the disco purse to the back of the van.

"Umm could you please check the glove compartment to see if you can find a cell phone?"

"Ok"

Thanks God she sounded more, relax? Her eyes were dead but she sounded like she was trying to hold herself a little and this sounds selfish but I think she was doing it because of me.

Wow! I wasn't expecting that. Like she said I opened her glove compartment and hell yeah, she had a lost of stuff going on in that thing. She had from condoms to hands sanitizer, from and sewing kit to wires and cigarettes and McDonalds toys? Tickets for upcoming rock concerts, underwear (I have to admit that I hold that underwear too long.) Pills, birth control, keys, IPods, cds, glasses, lip gloss, energy bars and a under all that I found a really nice Iphone.

"Umm Kim the phone." What the hell was happening to me? Since when Jared Najera is afraid of a girl? I mean ok she is my imprint but I am allow to use my charm.

"Thanks and I saw you holding my panties."

"Sorry, umm sooorry."

"Its ok, you are not the first pervert that I have seen."

She just called me pervert. And what the hell did she mean with _not the first pervert I have seen_ I mean I had a really bad desire to go and hunt every guy that had been near her. I didn't realize when I started putting my hands into fists because of the tedious fury of thinking of some guy disrespecting my Kim.

She parked the car in front of the La Push seven eleven and called some random number in her phone. I didn't talk; I just used my supernatural senses to catch the conversation of her and a dude that sounded really familiar.

"Tim I am skipping school today, can you cover for me?"

"Kim what happened, are you ok? Do you need help? Babe you sound really bad, talk to me."

What is with people today, wanting to talk to Kim? After rewinding the last words changed by Kim and the dude in the other line I realized that she was talking to one of the school's math teachers. Mr. Osborne I think.

"Look Tim, I am ok I mean you know how I am, it is just one of my many traumas hunting me. Just another of my meltdowns, I will be ok. I am always ok."

"Kim cut the crap; I can hear you sobbing please come back. We will drink a cup of tea and some Chinese food, some rice and noodles, just please come back, come back to us."

"Thanks, is tempting but I want to be out of the routine today and I am not alone."

When she said that she wasn't alone my heart started to pound really hard, like showing how much I was glad to be with her.

"Kim if I didn't know you I would think that you are skipping school to have a morning stand. Are you with Matthias or Josh?"

"Tim they are in school and I am with umm Jared."

"Ohh, umm wow! Ok but promise me that you will stop crying Kim, you are killing us all with this."

"Tim thanks for everything and I will try, I am always trying."

"Ok, I will cover for you. Some kind of mathematical problem. Take care. Love you."

"Love you too pumpkin pie."

Ok that was just surprising. First the envy, the confusion and the shock. For what I heard this kind of situation are common in Kim's life and every one except me knows her.

"Umm do you want something? I am out of coffee and chips."

"No, but let me go with you I don't want you to run away from me, ever."

**Kim POV**

"No, but let me go with you I don't want you to run away from me, ever."

"Ok I guess, and I won't run away from you, right now."

Today has been the strangest day of my life. I woke up happy, I had this great conversation with my mother and then one of my meltdowns hit me in front of the guy that I love the most in my life. In front of him I have been able to cry, to scream, to get all crazy and at the same time I have been able to talk, to not restrain my feelings. To not pretend, to be myself and to not be ashamed of how crazy I am. But there is not way that I can't deny the blame hunting every particle of my body because of the information that I have never said to anyone; I am not a person with many secrets, except for my nicotine habit and my Jared obsession but stuff like Joe and what happened to Peter I just prefer to keep them to myself. I would tell everything if someone asked me but I think that people around me, from my parents to my friends think that I am too traumatized that they just don't ask. They never ask me what I am thinking or what I am hiding, they just ask me if I am ok, unfortunately I am never ok.

To say that I am surprised with how he is trying to help me would be an incomplete statement, I am in shock. He just told me to not hurt myself and to not hurt him; he asked me to not run away from him. I won't do it right now but in my heart I know that I can't promise not to run away. Not because I am afraid or because I am coward, it's just that if I know that I am hurting in some way, that my presence is painful for someone I would escape. I did it with my parents by getting out of their professional life and I won't think it twice if I have to do it again. I am able just to hurt myself and I will keep doing it if it is the only way to not hurt anyone else.

"Where are we going?"

The sound of his voice took me out of my thoughts. _Good now we cant stop thinking about how emotional we are._ 'Hello mini me, I didn't miss you.' Thinking about his question made me ask myself where the hell I was going. We were driving on the highway that destroyed my life after my early buy of sour patch, Dr. Pepper, coffee and cheetos.

"We are going to my secret place."

"And would you talk to me?"

"Yes, Jared I will talk to you."

"Kim, you know that you can ask me and tell me whatever you want."

"Let's wait until we arrived to my place and you would ask me whatever you want and I will do the same. Ok?"

"Ok, sir."

I felt so comfortable being next to him, I could see how he blushed every time that I caught him staring at me. We arrived to la push beach. Since I came here I loved this place. It was like a fairytale that made you forget about every single one of your problems. There was this bench facing the Pacific Ocean, it was like a first class seat to a world full of fantasy. Just the image of the water in front of it and the green forest behind the bench made you want to be it. To be still in such an intense place forever or until a hurricane or any natural disaster hit the peninsula.

I took my normal seat at the right of the bench. It felt like déjà vu how I was sitting once again facing the ocean and next to me one of the most incredible man that I have ever known.

"So, why?"

"Why what?"

His mouth was full cheetos. I bought them because I knew that he loved them. I thought about what I was going to say now. I wanted to know why he was doing this to me, and what he was doing following me, letting me treat him like a toy or a little child and I wanted to know what did he think about what he saw this morning.

"Why the hell did you help me? What are you doing here? What do you think about what you saw? Why are you…"

"Hey wait, let start with the easy stuff, I mean we have the entire day. So well my name is Jared Najera you are Kimberley Brooks, I am 18 and I think you are 17. I helped you because I didn't want you to get hurt I mean maybe you are stronger than the bat boy but in the end it is a skeleton you could have gotten a bruised hand. What am I doing here, well I want to know you, I umm want to be next to you and I want to be with you and help you. And what do I think about what I saw emmm."

I knew that he was thinking about a nice way to explain what he saw. The look in his face was just common.

"Kim, with what I saw I realized how it hurts me when I see you crying, how much pain I can see in your eyes right now, how much you need to say everything and how much I would die to be the one able to listen to all your thoughts. What I saw made me feel how attached and attracted I am towards you."

"Ok, but what happened? You wake up today and said _I think I should hang out with the crazy girl of town _I mean you have never noticed me. Why now?"

"I understand that you must be wondering what the hell the stupid asshole is doing bothering you, I have a good reason but I can't tell you now. You have to trust me; I swear I have the best intentions with you. I want to be your friend and if you let me more than your friend one day. But Kim you will have to trust me. Do you think that you will be able to trust me?"

"I think I can trust you. But I swear you do something that could be considered as a prank, betray or whatever I will do voodoo on you. Understand?"

"Yes sir. Wait! You are kidding about the voodoo right?"

"Think what you want to think."

_Can we trust him? _Even mini me doesn't know the answer of that question, but with the things that I know about him I think that we can for now. I mean he is noble and he hates lies. How would he react if he knew that I have been lying to him for almost 2 years?

"So what do you want to know?"

"Everything please."

"Where should I start?"

"What about the beginning?"

"Hey don't tease me?"

"Sorry, ok tell me about your parents and friends and why you called a teacher and called him punkim pie."

"Well, my parents are travel agents; they have offices in Port Angeles, Forks and Seattle. They are really young; they had me after they graduated and my friends. Matthias, Camille and Josh are like my family, specially your lovely bat boy ha-ha, we have a little band and sometimes we play in Port Angeles in this place that someone like you would never think that it exists. And the teacher was Tim, Mr. Osborne. I met him a few years ago before he graduated from college, we became friends. You see him with the tie and everything but let just say that behind the shirt he has a The Ramones tee."

"Wow, wasn't expecting that. I mean is like with you there is a different world."

"Not a different world just another side of the same. Give me some cheetos please."

I felt sorry for him. He was looking at me like I was telling him that Santa Claus didn't exist. Now how to explain to one of the most popular kids that behind the Barbie party was a much beautiful, dark side of the world? Ok compare and contrast. I learned it in my sophomore year.

"Listen people like you, I mean you know jocks, cheerleaders, snobs, you think that people like me geeks, Goths, emos, spend their time playing video games and reading comics while you are drinking beer and nailing ladies. Well we do the same thing that you do but worse. We drink a lot, we have sex a lot, and we do drugs a lot. I don't do though. We have parties but not like you. We don't wait that one of our parents is out of town to invite some friends and drink beer, ha! we have places where we go everyday and do things that you can't imagine. And thinking about it, we really are freaks because we do stuff that are let's say rated R."

"And what makes you think that I don't know how to do those things?"

"First of all you don't know what things I am talking about. I can see how you are swallowing your drink and how your eyes are getting darker because the lust of what you think we might do."

Desire and lust are feelings that I never imagined Jared going through thinking about something that involves me. He can have every girl that he wants, and I know that the things that I am saying are true and that in a way I am more sexual active than the entire female population of the school. But again we are talking about Jared and because my experience that could be compare with the one of a 30 year-old, those eyes are the same of the dozens of guys that have been near me sexually speaking. He got closer to me with a smug crooked smile that made me melt again. He got closer and closer until his mouth was next to my ear and whispered.

"And could you show me those things one day?"

What could I say? Maybe I can be considered as a whore but this guy was just making me forget about every one of my problems with just the presence of his breath next to my body. It was really hot, and spicy. He smelled like cheetos and pines. Just freaking sexy and I can't deny that I have never been so turn on in my life.

Remembering that I have experience I decided to go cocky and quite smug. Exposed myself as someone beyond silly games, while because of him my inner 15 year-old teenager was screaming with the desire to get a peck of those fully lips.

"Well, I could but I am talking about heavy stuff here and I am not sure someone like you could stand it."

"Kim, always remember something about me. For what I really want I can do everything and I am not into games either."

He just said that he wanted me and I believe him, I really did because I know that behind those dark eyes full of lust and desire there is this boy incapable of lying and betraying. Jared can be whatever you want but he had never lied and he had never done anything similar with what I had done in the past.

"So what you want?"

"That's easy. I want you."

"You do?"

"Yes, but not in a pervert way, I mean yes I would love to do it with you. Shit that didn't sound right. What I mean is that I want to get to know you in an emotional and maybe if you want because obviously I want in a physical way?"

"Ok I would like that. I really appreciate that you find me interesting and that you want to get to know me."

"Kim, why you are so open with me, I mean hell I love it but why you didn't doubt about me in any moment?"

"It is because I know you. I know that under that bad boy appearance you are a really nice guy that hate lies and that love cheetos. You know we are really similar. We have this masks covering our really personalities but when we need them, we let some of our most beautiful qualities take a step outside and help us make the right decisions."

"And how do you know that I am like that?"

He grabbed my chin with his soft and hot hand and made me look at him. His hair was short but still he looked amazing. I took a deep breath and said the truth. One of the many things that I keep but I am up to let them been known.

"Somebody told me, and that somebody knew you like the palm of his hand."

I would never forget that Tuesday. It was the best of my life. We talked and ate chips the entire day. Since 8 am to 4 pm. It was so incredible how I didn't feel awkward next to him. How I let him touch my face. How every time his breath was near me the hair of my neck started to go up and how in a few hours he woke up feelings that I didn't know I had like pride, desire, security and love. He talked about the crazy things he does with his friends. He talked to me about his family but didn't talk about his dad. If he knew that I met his family and that in some way I feel the same thing when someone talks about that death. So we stalked about friends and favorites. I found out that he is not a book person like me. He prefers TV shows and comedies. He likes chocolate and the color brown. (I knew all that) but hearing it from him was like the first time. We talked about love, but we didn't go to the sex talk, I think he tried to respect me. In the end, it was the funniest conversation of my life and I just enjoyed it.

After our entire day sitting on the bench in front of the beach, it was time to go back to school. He needed his car. I felt a little apprehensive about not being with him. In those few hours I got use to his voice, his temperature next to my body. His fingers tracing paths in the small of my back, my hands around his muscles and his eyes staring at mine, just we the knowledge of leaving him I felt completely alone.

"So miss pixie, are you coming tomorrow? You should start coming to school you know."

"I will be here."

"I am looking forward to see you then. Bye Kim."

With that he gave me a small kiss next to my lips, I couldn't stand it. His head was kneeling through the window so I just grabbed it with my two hands and kissed him on the mouth. First he was surprised, I was trying so hard to let him know that I wanted this, that I wanted him to open his lips and let me taste his mouth with my tongue. When I touched his bottom lip with the tip of my tongue he moaned. Just the sound of him enjoying the kiss made me, sound nasty but I think it made me get a little wet.

He ended our kiss just to take two steps back, think and then none of the sudden he went to my door, opened it and grabbed me, he lifted me and kissed me. He opened his mouth. Our tongues had like a civil war, fighting for dominance, he closed the door of my car with my body. I located my legs around his waist and just kissed him. He bit me a little; after he almost ate my lips he traced this path from my jaw to my neck and finished in my ear. He teased my ear lobe with his tongue. I decided that I couldn't be the only one having satisfaction so I grabbed his hair and started teasing his neck with my tongue. He tasted so good, so manly, so fucking nice.

"Kim, you taste like apples and chocolates, Kim I don't think I could never stop kissing, or licking you or biting you."

With that I bit really hard the left side of his neck. He actually growled when I bit him and started licking the red spot that my teeth left there.

"So don't stop. Please never stop."

He chuckled and stop kissing me, he rest his forehead on mine and whispered on my lips.

"I would never stop if you let me."

"Don't worry, I would never stop you."

I took a deep breath. I didn't remember when I stopped breathing. He smiled at me and stroked my cheeks with his fingers.

"I will see you tomorrow ok?"

"But why you have to go?"

My voice sounded husky and full of lust and somehow sexy.

"Kim if I don't go now I will hurry something that I want it to be special. I mean I don't know if you can feel it but I need a long, really cold, almost freezing shower."

I looked down, and yes I could feel it and let's just say it was pretty hard and looked pretty huge.

I got off of him and try to compose myself; I took one of his hands in mines and took a glace at his eyes that in that moment were jet black with desire.

"Look, you asked me if I could show you how my life is, right. So tomorrow I have to sing in this underground club. Go, take a look at what I do, and see for yourself how better my people is."

"Where? I swear I would go anywhere for you."

"Let's say that is under the green elf in Port Angeles."

With that I got on my van and started the engine. His face looked worry; he probably was trying to figure out what the hell I meant with under the green elf in Port Angeles.

"Wait, What Kim that doesn't make any sense."

"You said that you would go anywhere for me."

"And I would"

"Well I suggest that you start looking for me."

He gave me his dimple smile and blew a kiss at me. I left him in the middle of the school's parking lot, full of desire and with a really fun enigma.

**Ok people this is not a rated M story so don't get me wrong, I am just trying to make the sexual parts sound sexy but at the same time subtle.**

**Since chapter 3 I have been giving clues of some of Kim's "secrets" that are not really secrets. So I would like to know if you I don't know figurate out!**

**Please Review and keep reading I hope that you liked it.**

**Cheetos!!!!!!!!!!**


	8. Chapter 7

**Ok, SORRY. I am really sorry and also embarrassed of this chapter. It is like a really weak comeback, so short and so meaningless and stuff. Ugh! I hate this. I have been having a lot of troubles lately, like doing really bad in school because I decided to forget about my responsibilities, I did well but damn it wasn't what I am used to and then I had like a little emotional breakdown and just a lot of bad stuff happened so please forgive me.**

**This is chapter 7: The underground**

For the first time in my life I feel like I am able to do anything. Fly, dance, scream, actually even being happy.

I was happy and I don't regret anything that I said or did, it was almost perfect.

His voice, his lips, his hair, him.

After leaving the boy of my dreams stuck in the middle of the school's parking lot full of lust and desire for little old me, I decided to recapitulate everything that happened.

First we talked, we kissed, and we shared one of the most comforting places that I know. And I didn't feel guilty about knowing what I know and doing what I do and saying what I say. He made me feel worthy and I would never be able to forget the feeling of somebody respecting what I think its right.

"_Under the green elf in Port Angeles."_ He must be just wondering and wondering what the hell I meant with that. Well "The Green elf" was actually one of the most obnoxious, motorcycles' riders kind of bars. I mean even someone like me thought that the place was just disgusting. But well like I said under it, there is what people like me like to call our pre-training adaptation school before we all go to hell. I know I believe in God. But I can't say that I am actually going to make it to heaven. My behavior the last couples of years of my existence could be compare with the one of the little doll with that the devil plays. Just outrageous.

The place actually didn't have an exact name. We just call it 'the underground'. We didn't kill people there, well I personally haven't but I am no really sure about Bruno the gay bartender. From my point of view the place was like the black market. You could buy from drugs to stolen kitchen supplies, clothes. I had to admit I got my lovely IPod there.

But after the drugs, sex, alcohol, the fetish, the crimes and all the creepy things in that ungodly place, the people were the most unbelievable in the entire world.

It could be compared with a mental institution; the gay bartender that had a weird obsession with emo/punk bands, the almost 90-year-old poet, the Hispanic guy that couldn't stop complaining of how he miss his country and every day he says he would go back but he just will go back to the bar. The bulimic actress, and just a bunch of freaks that in some way I actually adore.

They were my band's critics and well they were worse than Simon Cowell, but they were the best.

I arrived my house that like always was alone. My parents must be at work like always, but still I love that they did what they love. The best thing was when they looked at me knowing that I gave up some of my teen years so the could concentrate in what they love to do. It was hard to try to convince them that I would be fine if they just decided to go for it and spend most of their time in Seattle constructing their empire. I wanted to give them back what they lost when they had me. They gave up their golden years because of me, I just returned the favor. The raised me for 14 years. That was enough. It was the right time for them to follow their dream. Help people find their perfect destinations.

I was greeted by a hyper Lou that couldn't let me walk. Something must have happened.

"Lou, for Pete's says, let me proceed with my arrival."

I chuckled, I loved when my doggy version seem happy to see me. I went directly to my room after I locked the door and was allowed to walk normally after I crossed the kitchen. When I opened my door the horniest voice that I know welcomed me.

"Did you fuck him?"

"Hello to you too, Matthias. Yes I really miss you too, thanks for bringing me my homework. No you don't have to call my therapist."

"Forget about all that crap, tell me .?"

I couldn't help it, I smiled. This was the kind of moments that I doubted about Mattie's sexuality. Not even Camille that was like my only girl-friend would be so excited after I spend some time with a guy. Matthias was actually grinning like a 14-year-old that was going to hear the story of her best friend's first kiss. Bring the ice cream and the chick flicks and this would look like a slumber party.

I sat at my desk chair and faced him. The little idiot was hugging one of my pillows and getting anxious.

"Of course no. What do you think? That I am a whore or something? I spent less than ten hours with the guy."

"My dear, remember when we went to Chicago, ehh you spent less than three with that guy, Lucas or what ever and none of the sudden an old lady got out of the restroom screaming because she found you and the lovely guy going doggy style."

"First his name is Luck and it wasn't doggy style."

He threw the pillow over his head and glared at me with something like concern and sorrow.

"Kim, I was worried about you and I am sorry about all the awful stuff that I said. It's just that well I was sad that finally the day came."

"I forgive you, but don't do that again, don't get drunk unless I am in the same place with you, don't have sex with people you don't know and please don't talk about me behind my back. I know that you did it just because well you were drunk and you are an idiotic creature but you didn't mean any harm."

"Thanks. So tell me, if you didn't do anything exciting with Jared Jerk. What happened?"

"Well..."

In that moment I realized something. How the hell did he get in? Like reading my mind he just giggled and pointed at my window.

"It was open. You should start closing your windows, what would happen if I don't know a handsome young man, with incredulous good looks gets horny in the middle of the night and decides to come to your house and climb into your room?"

"I would hit him with a bat that I have hidden in this room and then I would call the cops. And you giggled."

"Ok, scratch that. And Miss I did not giggle. Matthias doesn't giggle and tell me about your day."

"Nothing happened, he just kissed me, and we talked and…"

I was interrupted by a sudden gasp. I couldn't stop the smirk in my face, he really couldn't believe it.

I told him everything, how we shared some unhealthy snacks, how he looked at me like he wanted to eat me. And especially how he couldn't stop smiling every time I told him one of my stories. When I got to the part of the "Green elf" Matthias just started plotting. The guy was just a cyclone of meanness which was why I adore him.

"So listen, I will help. Yes I will help the little prick, because he is not the smart enough to find by himself the bar. You gave the guy like a puzzle, dude. He actually could suffer a mental break down trying to find the right place."

"Speaking of tomorrow, what are we supposed to be singing?"

"Hypnotize. That was the last song that we practice and I don't think the band wants to play _never alone_ again. I think Josh got a trauma or something. Now he is praying before every meal. It's actually pretty interesting to see somebody like him saying thanks to Jesus."

"Ok, I like that song, and don't tease Josh you know he is quite sensitive. Well my little nun it's 11 o'clock, somebody should be getting home. We have school tomorrow."

"Kim, I thought this was your house. Are you a burglar or something?"

I smacked him because of his stupid sarcasm; we were lying on my bed facing my purple roof. Some days he would stay and sleep next to me. But after today's activities I would feel like I was betraying Jared if I spend the night with another man in my bed.

"Well, I should get going. I hate when you get lost in you thoughts."

"Why?"

"Because I know that you are thinking about him, and well I don't like it."

"You don't have a crush on me, do you?"

I got a little worried; the last thing that I wanted was my best friend hating the man that I loved because he was jealous.

"Hell no, I love you but not like that. You are my best friend, my platonic love lets say, and I want you to be with him because I know you love him. But that doesn't mean I have to like him. He is repulsive. So I am leaving, see you at school my prude."

With that he stood up from my bed and kissed me goodbye. The guy was crazy but he was sincere with me. He was my partner in everything. He was there when I was almost dead. He stood by my side when they almost took me to juvie. And he will be there when I develop a relationship with the guy of my dreams.

**So this was chapter 8 please I know I don't deserve it but please review!**

**I will update soon **


	9. Chapter 8

**So this is actually the right chapter 8, sorry about the little detail in the last chapter's author's note. I said I would update soon and I actually did. The next chapter will come soon and it will be how Jared tries to find the infamous bar and watch Kim doing what she knows how to do. I wrote the chapter when she finds out that he is a werewolf and my only intention is make people cry with everything that is going to happen. Enjoy.**

**Chapter 8: the voice of…**

**Jared POV**

What on Earth is the green elf and what in the hell is under it?

I know I love the woman but, did she have to be so cryptic?

I had the best day of my life. I have never felt so nice and tender and lovely and, damn I sound gay. But really it was so special and she really understands me. When we talked it was like she _loves _me?

I know that I love her, so in those few hours that I spent with her I decided to take everything I could get. Her smile that always start with a slight movement in the top of her upper lip, the sparkles in her dark eyes when she is talking about music, the sadness in those breathtaking brown pools when she talks about her parents, the fact that she smells the cheetos before she eats them and specially how her russet skin blush every time I touched her.

And thanks to something out there that I actually believe it could be God, I got the extremely sweet taste of her lips, the weight of her body on mine, the sound of her laugh on my lips, the friction of her skin next to mine, the feeling of her long legs wrapped around my waist, the sound of a moan when she felt my erection against her. But at the same time, and I really think that was the price that I had to pay for getting all those good things, she gave me a piece of her intelligence and by that I mean she told me something that made me dumber than what I thought I was.

Again, what on Earth is the green elf and what the hell is under it?

After she left me with the biggest boner of my life in the middle of the school's parking lot, I took my time to process all the good things that happened before I had to face the fury of Sam, the goofiness of Paul and the million questions of Emily. I got in my truck and headed towards the small house next to the beach with the hugest grin on my face. Oh how I love Kim.

**Emily POV**

I haven't seen Sam so nervous since the day he had to talk with my family about how he loved me and not my cousin. It sounds mean, but he looked like a mom waiting for her daughter to come from her first date, Just annoyingly motherly and ugh cute.

I love them, I really do. Especially Jared that is the sweetest of the members of the pack that well it is just him and Paul and Sam. I love Sam more than my own life; the pull that I feel towards him is so strong that I wouldn't hesitate on giving him my life if he asks for it. I already gave him my heart, body and soul. Why not my heart beat too? But Jared was my friend, the person on that I confide to tell my point of view of all the drama that has happened in my life. He really was my friend.

But going back for why I was so annoyed and complaining about Sam, I couldn't stop wondering where the hell Jared could be. This afternoon Paul came to my small house that had become their headquarters, like always he took his shoes off, grabbed something to eat and threw himself on the couch. Everything seemed normal until Sam and I decided to accompany him and realized that he was alone, solo, without Jared who was in fact in charge of him until he could control his phasing.

"Paul where is Jared and please can you get off your paws from my coffee table?"

"Sorry, it's not my fault that I am a freaking giant and I feel weird sitting, it's annoying getting used to the whole walking normal you know, I prefer being on fours."

"Yeah right, you used to do it all the time."

Such a stupid kid, he got a taste of what it feels to be a wolf for almost 3 whole weeks and now he claims he can't walk normal, such a baby.

"Paul stop your bullshit, where is Jared?" Leave Sam to be the voice of reason.

"Ah yeah, Jared, nice dude don't you agree, he adapt really nice." Leave Paul to be the voice of stupidity.

"Paul I am not kidding tell me where the hell is Jared, he is not safe walking around the streets with a lot of people!"

And here it come the alpha voice. Since the first word of that sentence Paul was standing straight up like a military listening to his commandant, even I decided to stand a little straighter after listen to his growl towards those words.

"Umm well, he left this morning, with Kim, his imprint. Ha ha you should have seen him; he followed her like a puppy. It actually looked like what you do with Em."

I giggled, I couldn't stop myself. My inner teenager was glowing after listening to Paul. He was right. I noticed that puppy behavior in Sam since the day he first saw me, but it was nice knowing that other people noticed. It made me feel proud of myself. I heard Sam fuming after Paul's comparison. I touch his arm so I could sooth him and saw how he melted under my touch. I recovered from my romantic moment and glared at Paul.

"Do you know where he is?"

"No, and I don't really want to know. I can't imagine where somebody like that freak could have taken him; I just hope he doesn't have a tattoo or something when he gets here."

That caught Sam's attention and he took me by my arm and sat on the love seat, me on his lap. Paul hesitated for a moment, he still was standing straight but when he saw us, he took the sight as an opportunity to go back to his starting position, without his feet on my table of course.

"Umm Paul you think that girl is that reckless."

I knew Kim, I mean I have talked to her and she was one of the brightest people I have ever met. She could read your body language and notice that you have a problem or what you were really feeling. She didn't know me and when I went to have a drink on that bar that her band play she gave me such a good advice that I decided to give Sam a chance. She didn't even know what was happening and she helped me.

"Don't say that. Neither of you know that girl. And this is going to be the first and last time I say this words. Don't you ever talk bad about Kim Brooks. Ever."

I stormed out from Sam's grasp and went to the kitchen. I was worried, I needed to cook.

So Sam was still making a hole in my living room floor, Paul was eating and making funny faces so I could laugh. The kid was dumb but he meant well. It was almost 7 o' clock in the evening when my door slammed open and the only thing that I could see was the biggest grin I have ever seen. Jared came to the kitchen ignoring Sam's questions and Paul's teasing and looked at us. With one low whistle of happiness he opened his mouth and asked one of the weirdest questions I have ever heard.

"Does any body knows where is the Green Elf in Port Angeles and what is under it?"

It sounded weird but I knew the answer.

**I hope you like it. I think is kind funny. I try to make this story funny. Especially for the fact that I am not a funny person at all, I am sarcastic sometimes but I try to write like a dark comedy. Please sorry if I lasted too much and you decided to give up this story. It will be good. If you are wondering this story is short, like 18 chapters and I will try to make it dramatic and sad because well I love it. I changed it to M because maybe I will put some sexual details.**

**Leave me to try to be the voice of sarcasm.**

**Review and if you do it I will send you a sneak peak for the next chapter. I want to reach the 20 reviews please help. It doesn't matter if you tell me how bad I am just review. And please tell me of what people could leave you to be the voice of. I like my mom's: **_**Leave me to be the voice of embarrassing you**_**. I love her. **

**Love and peace and muffins and cookies. **

**JP**


	10. Chapter 10

So yeah I basically suck. I haven't updated in like a year and I will be honest is because I just lost hope in the story. I started reading and writing poetry and living real life. I am a student so school took a lot of my time so I will just post some chapters that are the ones that made me decide to start writing this. Really sorry but for my story there are 100 way better don't you think and please go read Parachute is the best.


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